I've been on and off a bunch of sh*t and none of it really helped all that much if at all. Meds don't do anything but alter your brain chemistry. You don't know the % of your problems that are chemical either, nobody really does. Given that you said your lifestyle sucks and you have a closet full of skeletons, I doubt yours is due as much to chemistry as it is to life factors that lead you into depression. Meds don't do sh*t as far as helping you talk anything out either, they may even make you worse and numb your feelings. My teen years sucked but lets be real, a lot of people's teen years sucked. Anyone who had a fantastic 13-20 is in the minority. I'd recommend going to a therapist before I'd recommend medicating yourself. The best way I've found to get over depression is exercise like hell, eat right and fix any sleep issues you may or may not have. Get those 3 on track and you will most likely start to feel better.